Saturday, June 22, 2013

Beautiful Disaster by Jamie McGuire



**Warning:  This is a LONG review and I am a total quote whore on this one.  That’s how much I love this book!  Enjoy!**


Abby Abernathy is a good girl. She doesn’t drink or swear, and she has the appropriate number of cardigans in her wardrobe. Abby believes she has enough distance from the darkness of her past, but when she arrives at college with her best friend, her path to a new beginning is quickly challenged by Eastern University’s Walking One-Night Stand.

Travis Maddox, lean, cut, and covered in tattoos, is exactly what Abby wants—and needs—to avoid. He spends his nights winning money in a floating fight ring, and his days as the ultimate college campus charmer. Intrigued by Abby’s resistance to his appeal, Travis tricks her into his daily life with a simple bet. If he loses, he must remain abstinent for a month. If Abby loses, she must live in Travis’s apartment for the same amount of time. Either way, Travis has no idea that he has met his match.

First let me say this is one of my all time favorite books.  I know a lot of people gave this book bad reviews, I am NOT one of those people.  I love everything about this book.  I know there are a lot of negative reviews about it.  I read a lot of them before I started but I decided to give it a try anyway.  I loved 50 Shades so I looked forward to BD.  Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and while I respect them I don’t agree with the negative ones at all.  Yes there were parts that went a little extreme but I didn’t think he was going to turn into a serial killer because of his rage.  He loved her to the point of insanity. 

Abby is in college and running from her past.  She is the daughter of a notorious poker player and she isn’t exactly bad at playing herself.  She is smart, funny, and beautiful in an understated kind of way.  She’s also witty, sarcastic, and independent because she had to be.

Travis is Travis Maddox.  He’s hot, built, tattooed, edgy, broody, and dark.  He has serious anger issues and some would say emotional issues.  He’s is a very controlling and possessive alpha male.  His mother died when he was young.  He lives in an apartment off campus with his cousin Shep.  He’s a womanizer with a long list of women on his couch but never in his bed.  He drives a motorcycle and fights in an underground fighting ring.  He puts the bad in bad boy.

“It’s dangerous to need someone that much. You’re trying to save him and he’s hoping you can. You two are a disaster.”

Travis and Abby meet at a fight.  She instantly has the nickname Pigeon that he gives her.  This is what he calls her throughout the book.  She’s intrigued by him but doesn’t want to admit it or her attraction to him.  She realizes they have a class together where she’s introduced to him officially.  They form a friendship because she refuses to give him more because of how he is with other girls.  He’s into her but he’s hiding it because he promised her that he would only be friends with her. While they are just “friends” she begins dating a guy named Parker that Travis can’t stand.  He can’t stand him mainly because of the feelings he has for her.

He has a habit of screwing up where she’s concerned.  I understand his thinking honestly.  She could be a little annoying about things.  Like the night she was mad at him and he brought two barflies home and was with both of them while she was asleep in his bed down the hall.  He doesn't know how to handle relationships.

She goes with him to a fight and they make a bet which she loses.  Because of the loss she has to stay in his apartment for a month with him.  She has to sleep in his bed with him also.  On the last night of the bet the mood is sad.  They end up sleeping together and then she slips out in the middle of the night.  This comes as a shock since he thought they had finally reached the point where they could be together.  When he gets up the next morning and realizes she isn’t there, he storms though the house breaking stuff and throwing stuff.  Her best friend has to go back to their dorm to get Abby to call him so he will calm down.

She stays at her dorm after that and resumes dating Parker (they stopped because of her living with Travis for the month).  They go back to the friend’s stage and he does well at it.  The problem is that she feels for Travis what he feels for her.  She’s in love with him but doesn’t want to admit it to herself. 
She goes out with Parker but can’t stop thinking about her plans with Travis the next night.  Travis calls when she gets home and he shows up.  This is a turning point for them.  He begs her to call Parker and tell him it’s over so they can be together.  He tells her he loves her, that he’s in love with her.

“Call Parker. Tell him you don’t wanna see him anymore. Tell him you’re with me.”

She fights with him a little more on this but then finally gives up knowing that he’s who she wants. 

“I’m sorry for calling you so early, but this couldn't wait. I…can’t go to dinner with you on Wednesday.”  “I can’t see you at all, actually.” 
“I’m…pretty sure I’m in love with Travis,”

So he finally gets what he wants…her.  The road together is going to be far from easy.  These two are like fire and gasoline.  They are volatile at best.  His temper is something to behold.  He doesn’t like guys talking to her, he doesn’t like guys buying her drinks.  He will fight without a second thought when it comes to her.  It gets on her nerves and it causes them to fight a lot.  When they are bad they are awful but when it’s good it’s great. 

They are at a club and a guy grabs her on her way out.  Travis swings at the guy without thinking about it and doesn’t hit her but causes her to fall in the process.  He’s immediately sorry but it costs him a night alone.  He has to grovel the next morning after spending a night alone thinking he’s lost her.

She goes to meet his family and they realize who she is after she hustles them out of money playing poker.  She’s a card shark.  It’s a big deal, one she doesn’t want people to know.  Her dad is a sorry guy.  He blames her for his bad luck when his lucky streak ran out.  He’s the reason she ran from home.  She doesn't want people to know it’s her dad. 

He has her name tattooed on his wrist and in true Pigeon fashion she freaks out about how permanent it is.  He also got one on his ribs in Hebrew.  She keeps telling him they need to slow way, way down.  She’s making a big deal out of everything.

‘I belong to my beloved, and my beloved is mine.”

Abby’s dad shows up at the school.  He needs money and the only way she can get him out of her life is to get it for him.  To do that she will have to go back to Vegas and hustle the money at the poker tables.  She is trying to get away from that life so she’s not happy about it.  While in the casino she runs into her ex and because he helps her she has to go to lunch with him.  This cause a huge fight with her and Travis.  Not that I blame him for being upset, she sort of just walks into this stuff.  She doesn’t get the money in time.  They go to make a deal with the guy her dad owes the money too but it becomes pretty apparent he’s not going to let them leave without a fight.  Travis isn't gonna let that happen.  He takes down his two goons and that leads to another problem. 

“I hope you know, Benny, that when I take out your men, I mean no disrespect. But I’m in love with this girl, and I can’t let you hurt her.”

Travis took out one of the goons who was supposed to fight the following night.  To get them out of trouble he had to agree to fight in the guys place.  Not a big deal with him but afterward, Benny offers him a chance to fight and make big money.  Abby, trying to get away from that life tells him absolutely not but he can’t get the dollar signs out of his eyes.  He takes the job without talking to her and when he tells her when they get home she leaves him.  She will not be a part of that lifestyle anymore.  It’s over and there’s nothing he can do to get her back.  I understand why he did it.  He was trying to make a life for them but this wasn’t the way to do it.  As she’s leaving he figures out what she’s doing and runs after her.  She spends the night in her best friends dorm room watching him pound on her door all night.  The following morning she begins weeks of ignoring him.

After his show at the dorms he starts to lose it.  He gets kicked out of class for kicking over the desks; he’s fighting and other stuff.  He’s going off the deep end.  He runs into her a week later (actually he pretty much stalked her) and tells her he turned Benny down.  He begs her to forgive him and to take him back.  She still won’t hear it and won’t talk to him. 

Parker sees this as his way back in and starts talking to her again.  She lets him know that she’s not interested and they just become friends. 

She ends up going to Thanksgiving with Travis at his dad’s.  They aren’t together and she doesn’t want to go but she had already told him she would.  He’s using it as a way to spend time with her.  After they fake it in front of his family all night she lets him sleep with her since it’s their last night together.  He just wants to hold her.  It’s pitiful and I feel so bad for him.  He’s hurting and she just acts like she doesn’t care.  He gave up everything.  He tells her the next morning that it’s there last day together and he’s gonna make it count.  He’s gonna kiss her and love on her.  She agrees to it.  She finally decides that she’s gonna give him another chance but then he tells her he’s going to let her go so she can be happy.  He just wants to be friends.  He does this so he can keep her in his life, it’s not what he wants but he does truly want her to be happy.  She doesn’t tell him that she wants him back thinking he doesn't feel the same.  IT’S CALLED COMMUNICATION PEOPLE!

She goes to the apartment with her best friend and Travis stumbles in with one of his whores.  A fight breaks out between him and Abby.  He says some pretty sad stuff to her.  We see that it’s been weeks and he’s been acting normal, even happy but it’s all been an act.  He’s dying inside but he just want her to be happy.  She flees out the door and he chases after her. 

“I can’t win with you. I can’t win with you! You say you’re done…I’m f***ing miserable over here! I had to break my phone into a million pieces to keep from calling you every minute of the damn day—I’ve had to play it off like everything is just fine at school so you can be happy…and you’re f***ing mad at me? You broke my f***in’ heart!”

She goes out to dinner with Parker but it’s just as friends.  Travis shows up (not stalking her for once) and gets a phone call.  Travis has a fight and he wants her there.  She actually leaves Parker sitting at the table and goes with Travis.  After an issue at the fight he tells her why he really got her to go and she kicks him out of his room.

Ok so to make a really long review a little shorter.  There is a party awhile later in which they all go to.  Travis shows up to the party and she’s dancing with some guy.  He gets angry and proposes a toast…

“To douchebags!” 
 “And to girls that break your heart,” he bowed his head to me. His eyes lost focus. 
“And to the absolute f***ing horror of losing your best friend because you were stupid enough to fall in love with her.”

Then he goes all cave man a few minutes later and throws her over his shoulder and takes her to his apartment.  I got to give it to him, he’s had enough.  They are gonna settle this now.  They are gonna be together or they aren’t.  The days of playing are over.  Once they get to his apartment it doesn’t take long for emotions to get in the way and they end up in bed.  She finally decides to stop running from him and takes him back.  There are no more break ups, and they are in it for the long haul.

There is a fire at his last fight.  He can’t get to her and she is standing with his brother.  While they are trying to escape, she and his brother get separated.  She almost dies, comes very close but Travis makes it to her in time and gets her out of the building safely.  They think for a minute that his brother died in the fire but he didn’t.  A lot of people died in the fire.  After they get back to his apartment and are in bed they come up with this crazy plan to fly to Vegas and get married.  They leave the next day and return the day after married.  She has a new tattoo that says Mrs. Maddox.

That’s it.  This is an amazing book.  I loved all of it.  I know some people have issues with Travis and the way he acted, but I think he just loved her to the point he couldn’t breathe without her.  Pigeon’s roommate did make a good point though.  She said that he was codependent; he went from having no respect for women to not being able to breathe without her in no time.  That doesn’t make him crazy though.  I give it 5 stars though it deserves more.

Way to go Jamie McGuire!  My hat is off to you, and I have nothing but love for this book.

My Travis/Abby

Favorite Quotes

I’m impulsive, and hot-tempered, and you get under my skin like no one else. You act like you hate me one minute, and then you need me the next. I never get anything right, and I don’t deserve you…but I f***ing love you, Abby. I love you more than I’ve loved anyone or anything, ever. When you’re around, I don’t need booze, or money, or the fighting, or the one-night stands…all I need is you. You’re all I think about. You’re all I dream about. You’re all I want.”

“You know why I want you? I didn’t know I was lost until you found me. I didn’t know what alone was until the first night I spent without you in my bed. You’re the one thing I’ve got right. You’re what I’ve been waiting for, Pigeon.”

“It’s over. Go home.” His eyebrows pulled in. “You’re my home.”

“I’m not your anything,” I snapped, glaring up at him. His eyebrows pulled in and he stopped dancing. “You’re my everything.”

He stomped toward me, planting his hands on the bed and leaning into my face. “WELL I BELONG TO YOU!” 
He looked at my lips, panting. “I belong to you,”